Tuesday, January 8, 2019

The Harry Potter Series by J.K. Rowling


I hardly even know where to begin to describe the incredible recent series of events. I should start by saying that I had absolutely no interest in reading Harry Potter, for obvious reasons. But my granddaughter Tina, to whom I have a hard time saying no (despite her manners), came over with her complete set and insisted, tearfully (I may have made a pejorative comment about the fantasy genre as a whole), that I read one. So to make her happy, and because I felt a little guilty, I started the first one - not because I planned to read them in order, mind you, but just because it was the smallest. But then the strangest thing happened - the book was good! Really good. I read the whole thing in my La-z-Boy in one sitting, and I went right on to the next one. And that one was good too! I became immersed. I read at a frenetic pace and lost track of time. I felt...happy! However, about halfway through The Prisoner of Azkaban, I had a realization. It suddenly dawned on me that everything I had read as a child was complete and utter crap. All of it. All my favorites, so hollow and thin and simple. I was angry again. I lumbered up to the attic, found a dusty box full of books from my youth, and dumped the entire thing in the recycling bin. Maybe they'll make more Harry Potters out of them, I thought! I made a brief stop in the kitchen for a deviled egg, then went right back to reading. I read until I fell asleep. As it turns out, it was only 4:00 in the afternoon, but after a brief nap, I finished The Goblet of Fire before bed. I slept better than I have slept in years. I woke up refreshed and determined. I poured a large black coffee with only half my customary whiskey in it, and I sat down to read. It was incredible! What amazing combinations of humor, wonder, and drama. What deftness in dealing with death, dating, and destiny. What years of my youth wasted reading Doctor Doolittle and Mister Popper's Penguins! But there was no time to worry about that now. I read like the wind, like a man possessed, like I had nothing else in the world to do (in truth, I had nothing else to do). I read all day, skipped lunch, pissed in a bottle so I wouldn't have to get up (just kidding, but I thought about it), and turned the final pages of the Deathly Hallows in the early evening. You would think I was exhausted, but no! I felt exhilarated, inspired - all was well! I decided that it was time for me to go out for a walk and admire the sunset. I was thinking that I should be more appreciative of the world and enjoy the sights and sounds of nature. But when I got out there, all I could hear was my neighbor Margaret's little schnauzer yipping away like crazy. God damn that dog! Oh, the many times I have imagined slipping some Xanax into a burger and chucking it over her fence. It would be completely justifiable. That little cur was ruining my bibliographic ecstasy, and I was not going to have it. I started walking over there, but in my agitated state, I missed the patch of ice on the sidewalk (Margaret - do you see a law suit coming?) and next thing I knew, I went ass over tea kettle and landed right on my back. It knocked the wind out of me to be sure, and I needed a few moments to catch my breath. After I did, though, came another realization. I could not move. My poor old body was rattled and just didn't have the strength. And it was cold. How stupid was I? What had gotten into me? A couple of minutes on the sidewalk were enough to realize that I had no hat, no gloves, and the sun was dipping. Is this to be my undignified end, I wondered? Will I not get to sue Margaret for negligent sidewalk care after all? What a terrible shame that would be! And if she notices and comes out to help, will being in her debt be better or worse than dying on the sidewalk? It was difficult to figure out. Luckily for me, the mail was miraculously late, and Red, my longtime mail carrier, found me on the ground and obtained help. I explained that I was just trying to get a different angle to see the sunset, but he called an ambulance anyway. And so here I am, writing this on my grandson's laptop in a recovery room at the University Hospital. Nothing broken, I am told, just some bruised ribs and a harsh reminder about reality. I should be able to get a lot of reading done in here, although after Harry Potter, why bother? I would consider reading the series over again, but it is clearly too dangerous.

21 comments:

  1. Wow, that was some fall! I hope you are up and about and able to enjoy the next sunset.

    I liked Harry Potter through about book 4. That first one really was a wowser. A completely wonderful tale.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Maria. No windows in this room, so we'll see how I feel when I go home. I was never big on sunsets before, really.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, but once you're trapped in a hospital room ANY sunlight starts to look pretty good. There are lots of books that might cheer you up. :) Maybe you could start slower--you know, instead of going right to the TOP of great books, read some GOOD and DECENT fantasy first. That way you won't be so stunned by a good mood when it happens. Go home soon, get well and continue your crabby ways.

      Delete
  3. I am glad you are okay. Harry Potter is the one and only book series (okay... books)my husband has read in our 27 years of marriage. He even read it more then once. He got addicted to it when we were on a road trip and I was reading it out loud to my daughters. Then it became a family pass time to read all the books together. Then of course we had to see all the movies. Since you enjoyed the books, you should watch the movies while you are laid up. They don’t have as much detail as the books, But they are still very good. Thank you for writing this blog. I Thouroughly enjoy reading it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your husband might love The Hobbit. :) Classic. Out of this world good!

      Delete
    2. That's a beautiful story. There are no windows in my room here, so movies are a good idea. I should be home soon, though, and ready to resume my normal routine of doing nothing. Thanks for reading my blog!

      Delete
  4. Yes, reading Harry Potter is dangerous in many ways! Glad you're okay though! And thanks for writing this amazing review. I really laughed and I couldn't agree more. Such brilliant books, written with a love for detail and just heart-warming. Very difficult to comeclose to that feeling while reading other books.
    (Loved this sentence btw: 'What deftness in dealing with death, dating and destiny' You, sir, really know how to word!
    Looking forward to reading more thoughts on books from you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks so much Nora. I am always pleasantly surprised to learn that someone actually read something I wrote. My grandson assures me that people do, but it seems contrary to logic.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ohhh I hope you recover quickly... loved your review on HP, I won't be the only one when I say, it's one of my favorite series and am still waiting on my Hogwarts letter hehehe

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sorry to hear about your dreadful fall! hoping for a speedy recovery! Harry Potter was a huge part of my childhood! books and even movies!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm glad you're doing okay! Especially since I had a blast reading this review.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thank you! Back to my regular, angry self...

    ReplyDelete
  10. I hope you are recovering from your fall.
    I have so much love for HP - they're just so magical. Grest post 😍

    ReplyDelete
  11. I really enjoyed your review :D too bad about the fall though! I have to remember to come back to read your reviews more often, it was hilarious :D

    ReplyDelete
  12. I love this review! You had me giggling the entire read through. Since this was posted in January, I'm hoping, guessing that you're doing a whole lot better. 😊😊

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, yes, all is well now. Except my back, of course. And my knees. And my bad eye. And the other eye. And that rash.

      Delete
  13. Hello I am so delighted I located your blog, I really located you by mistake, while I was watching on google for something else, Anyways I am here now and could just like to say thank for a tremendous post and a all round entertaining website. Please do keep up the great work. Harry potter wizards unite unlimited gold

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your kind words. Most of my life happened by mistake too.

      Delete
  14. I like your post. It is good to see you verbalize from the heart and clarity on this important subject can be easily observed... editing of books,

    ReplyDelete