Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Being Mortal by Atul Gawande


I think Kevorkian Junior is right here. It's time for all of you to stop bothering us and just let us die. I mean, let's be clear. You don't care all that much about old people really - you just want to make sure you are doing everything necessary so that when we are gone you can have a clear conscience. Wouldn't want to have those echoes of guilt in the back of your mind while you're cashing that inheritance check, right? As it happens, I am scheduled for another procedure next week - this time on my eye. So if you don't hear from me again, thanks to both of you who have been reading this blog. I'd like to say it was worth it, but I'm too old for bullshit. Anyway, I'm told that it is safe and will help me and all that shit, but there is still like a 5% chance that I will lose my sight and whatever small pleasures are still available to me. It reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode I saw a long time ago. There's this misfit who gets made fun of by everyone who just wants to read all day. And then one day he wakes up and the entire Earth is deserted. He doesn't know what to do, but then he realizes that he can do whatever he wants, so he goes to the library. He comes out with a huge stack of books and then as he's walking home, he drops his glasses and steps on them. Fucking moron. Well, it's kind of like that anyway. The point being, leave us alone! Now you understand why old people don't like going to the doctor, assholes.

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